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Jaskier ♫ The Sandpiper ([personal profile] rollstoseduce) wrote in [community profile] metalogs 2022-06-28 10:42 pm (UTC)

Open | TDM prompts as canon intro

((from here, in case you need to refresh the deal with the cats))

1. Diadem Hotel

[After Childe's heroic rescue, a trusty NPC takes Jaskier to the hotel and answers the hundred questions he has. It's a lot to take in, to say the least, but after the initial shock, Jaskier definitely gets excited about a whole new world and the incoming adventures. First, though, he needs to shower.

That... that is indoor plumbing. With hot water. And gosh, the scent of this not-oil-for-the-hair! Oh, he already doesn't want to leave.

Happy to have his lute and hat back somehow (magic, it's always magic), Jaskier takes them with him to have breakfast at the buffet. At least most of the food looks familiar, and what he can't recognize he still can take some sort of guess, so he puts a little bit of everything on the biggest plate he can find, takes two cups to fill with different kinds of tea, and finds himself a table where he can figure out the phone thingy while he eats.

His only technological knowledge is the little tips the NPC has given him, so at some point, he'll end up touching something by accident. Like right now, when suddenly Never gonna give you up begins playing at full volume - yep, accidentally rickrolling the entire room, a pity he doesn't understand the implications. Jaskier yelps and fumbles with his phone until he turns it off, then notices many people are frowning at him - perhaps even you, random stranger!]


My apologies, [He says with his most charming smile.] Funny little contraptions, aren't they?

[A few minutes later, he'll be making (kinda dirty) sounds while eating a chocolate croissant. He doesn't know what this brown stuff is but he absolutely loves it.]

2. Shopping Mall

[They told him these little plastic(??) rectangles equal coin. Jaskier isn't sure he understands how, but he isn't about to look at a gift Roach on the mouth. The bard will be wandering around, aah-ing and oooh-ing at everything, asking as many questions as he can before people get tired of him. Care to catch him? That said, most of his attention will be focused on two shops:

A. Clothing: he touches every fabric and celebrates the fact men have many more options here than at home. After taking a good look around, though, he still has one question.]


So many styles, how delightful! Pray tell, how I do know what counts as fashionable? [He thinks he's talking to the clerk behind him, but maybe it's actually your character! Suddenly, he pulls a face as he stares at a pair of crocs.] What the fuck are those? Please tell me I am not expected to wear them.

[B. Music: of course he finds the music shop! And the best part is, this is one of those places that has a piano outside for guests to have a little fun. Curious as hell, Jaskier presses each key to figure out the notes as he lowly sings a little tune.]

♫ Oh fishmonger, oh fishmonger, come quell your daughter's hunger~ ♫

[The innuendo he adds to that sentence implies is not actual hunger he's talking about. But before he realizes what's going on, his hands are moving and playing the melody on the piano as if this wasn't a completely new instrument for him. When Jaskier finally notices, he freezes with wide eyes, then yelps and steps back until he bumps into your character. Usually he'd apologize, but right now he's a little busy freaking out.]

I played that! How did I play that?! I don't know how to play that!

[Renown poet expressing himself perfectly, huh. See, part of Jaskier's new bardic powers include knowing how to play any instrument you give him. He just doesn't know that yet...]

3. Here kitty kitty

[You don't spend over twenty years traveling with a monster hunter without learning to climb a tree to stay away from said monsters. However, traveling with the mutated monster hunter that cats avoid means Jaskier isn't used to dealing with kitties. He climbs the tree and reaches the right branch, but he doesn't think of being sneaky in his approach, so of course the cat sees him, causing the chaos magic to kick in.

Now there's something a little bigger than a cat to worry about.

The mysterious beast on the ground begins hitting the tree as Jaskier screams and climbs to higher branches - yes, he's supposed to have magic now, but he's still figuring that out. And years of having run as his first instinct are hard to override.]


Fffffffffuck- Kikimora alert, kikimora alert! A little help over here, for fuck's sake!

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