"Don't make me start a union, Jason. I'll do it." This is the worst threat she can think of, even though Jason is a good boss and they're all friends and considering all the illegal activity going on, a union wouldn't do much god. It's still the scariest thing to say to a business owner.

"But I'll give you Mariah Carey. It's the best part of December." And November, these days, as the war on Christmas continues to gain territory.