( jason didn't grow up with a safe space to--break down like this. he had to take care of his mom, because she was too sick to take care of herself most the time. then she was gone, and jason had to take care of himself in a place affectionately named crime alley. where no one came out without getting at least a few scars, and jason has plenty of them to show for it. he had himself, then he had bruce and alfred, and as soon as he was starting to get comfortable, to find his footing somewhere he did have support, he was dead. he came back, and all he had was talia until he didn't have her, either. and by then none of it mattered. he was a nobody, and then he was red hood, crime lord turned criminal turned part time vigilante, and no one has time to let themselves fall apart. he tells himself to get up, pull himself together, and he tapes together the pieces of jason todd he can get his fingers on. calls it good enough and keeps going.
he's had people he trusts not to fuck him over since then. he had roy, who jason almost got killed. artemis and bizzaro, who jumped into a black hole. dick and tim have been. . trying, over the last few years. most of the bats have been. but jason's not a kid anymore. he never was. he'll tell tim and the rest of them over and over again that it's okay to not be okay, but he can't give himself that same space. because when jason breaks, he shatters. jason shudders on an exhale, still keeps himself quiet because he has to be.
sucks in another breath, before he's shoving off of bruce. keeps his head bent down, so his face isn't visible. raises a hand to wipe away tears, but it mostly just--smears blood over his eyes. pulls in another breath, steadying, before pressing the domino mask back on. another shaky exhale, and he's wincing as he pulls himself up straight.
stands up, shoulders squared, lips twisted into a little frown because it helps hide how shaky he is. he'll pull himself back together, he just needs another moment. jason's standing, he's steady, that's about as much as he's going to get right now.
and as if the entire incident never happened, he turns back around towards the batmobile. raises a hand to wave bruce forward. )
no subject
he's had people he trusts not to fuck him over since then. he had roy, who jason almost got killed. artemis and bizzaro, who jumped into a black hole. dick and tim have been. . trying, over the last few years. most of the bats have been. but jason's not a kid anymore. he never was. he'll tell tim and the rest of them over and over again that it's okay to not be okay, but he can't give himself that same space. because when jason breaks, he shatters. jason shudders on an exhale, still keeps himself quiet because he has to be.
sucks in another breath, before he's shoving off of bruce. keeps his head bent down, so his face isn't visible. raises a hand to wipe away tears, but it mostly just--smears blood over his eyes. pulls in another breath, steadying, before pressing the domino mask back on. another shaky exhale, and he's wincing as he pulls himself up straight.
stands up, shoulders squared, lips twisted into a little frown because it helps hide how shaky he is. he'll pull himself back together, he just needs another moment. jason's standing, he's steady, that's about as much as he's going to get right now.
and as if the entire incident never happened, he turns back around towards the batmobile. raises a hand to wave bruce forward. )
We've got shit to do.