Late April catch-all! (open, one closed prompt!)

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Who: Doreen eatsnutsandkicksbutts and you!
What: Just slice-of-life stuff!
When: throughout late April / early May
Where: Central City
Content Warnings: nah, we good!


Fightin' Crimes!

[ Late-night muggings aren't exactly uncommon in Central City. Maybe you're about to jump in and stop a mugging-in-progress, or maybe you're the unlucky one who's getting mugged? Who knows! Either way, the mugging is interrupted when a short figure, just absolutely covered from head to tail in squirrels, drops into the alleyway from above and grabs one of the muggers by the scruff of the neck, hoisting him off the ground. ]

We have talked about this, Jeremy! Don't think I don't recognize you under that balaclava! What happened to community college, huh?

[ One slight problem with the squirrel-suit: not much peripheral vision. SG doesn't see the second mugger coming up behind her. Feel like lending a hand? ]


Karaoke night - closed to Sleeper!

[ A few months back, Doreen and Mark had tried out one of The Descendant's private karaoke rooms... and several furry friends of Doreen's had tagged along in her purse, because what the hell, karaoke sounded like fun, the rooms were soundproof, squirrels don't set off metal detectors, and they were joining the only two humans around who would be able to understand their singing. Since then, Squirrel Karaoke Nights (sometimes accompanied by Mark, when he's free!) have become a fairly regular thing, whenever Doreen has enough extra cash for a fun night out and wants to burn off some steam.

Tonight is one of those nights. Doreen has half a dozen squirrels chilling with her on the table, a second microphone propped up against her purse at squirrel-level, a small plate full of acorns and trail mix for snacks, and a playlist. ]

Ready, guys? 3-2-1...

Aaaand do your hair toss, check your nails! Baby, how you feelin'? [ This is followed by a squeaky, answering chorus of: ] "Feelin' good as hell!"


Rooftop hangouts

[ Usually, rooftop parkour is a great way to burn off some steam and get some exercise. Tonight though, Doreen is sitting on the edge of a chimney and shrugging her jacket off to get a better look at her right shoulder. There's a thick bruise and some scraping there, which is... weird. Doreen doesn't injure easily, nothing short of being hit by a brick wall should be able to hurt her like this. ]

... The hell?

[ Usually she'd stick with 'heck', but this justifies some mild profanity, she thinks. ]

Wildcard!
[ (( hit me up at sonopants or dm the journal if you'd like to do anything else!)) ]

Comments

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

[ The bolas snap around the guy's ankles, sending him to the ground with an undignified THUMP, and Doreen takes the opportunity to hang Jeremy the Mugger from a drainpipe by his jacket. One of the squirrels hands her some zipties, while another produces a small notepad and pencil. By now, the woman who was being mugged has already called the cops and run for it, so they're just on cleanup duty. ]

Thanks for the assist, random good samaritan!

[ Once the muggers are ziptied, she writes a note that says 'HI COPS, these guys tried to mug a young woman, and could use some therapy and/or community service!'. ]

[robintohood]

[Jason rolls his eyes and decides to parkour and swing his way closer to Doreen. Curiosity is getting the best of him]

Your friend couldn't watch your back.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Excuse you, my friends did awesomely, and I think we should continue this conversation elsewhere, yeah? Cops are gonna show up soon.

[ The squirrel-suit points upwards, and Doreen leaps onto the landing of a nearby fire escape, and parkours her way upwards. Meet her on the roof!

After a moment, a pamphlet for the local community college floats down and lands on Jeremy the Mugger's head.]

[robintohood]

[Jason uses his grappling gun again and follows Doreen shortly afterwards]

You're lucky I was in the neighborhood.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

'Scuse me?

[ She crosses her arms over her chest, and the squirrels flow out of the way to rearrange themselves comfortably. ]

I appreciate the assist, but we had that covered.

[robintohood]

[So bizarre looking at that suit]

Have one or two check behind you too and then you're fine.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Yeah, it's been a while since we've pulled Chestnut Maneuver Alpha, we're all a bit out of practice. Take five, guys. Great job out there!

[ The squirrels practically stream off of her and gather around her ankles, except for Tippy, who stays put on her shoulder. ]

[robintohood]

[In a dry tone. Under his helmet, Jason's also arching an eyebrow]

"Chestnut Maneuver Alpha?" The squirrel suit?

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Yeah! Cool, huh? Not sure how often we'll be able to pull that off once summer hits, it gets pretty warm in there.

[ The dry tone bounced right off her, it's evident from her tone that Doreen thinks the squirrel suit is very cool. ]

[robintohood]

[Sure. Let's roll with that]

You know, a mask would probably be easier. Though if you're going for weirding out muggers to stop them then good job with the squirrel suit made of squirrels.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Hey, it works! If people start lookin' for an 'Actually-Made-of-Squirrels-Girl' cryptid instead of me, I'd call that a win. Besides, it's good for making escapes. Hey guys, suit up for a sec!

[ The squirrels engulf her again... and then Doreen steps out the back of the armor, leaving the squirrel suit standing in front of her before the squirrels scatter and go their own ways. ]

Ideally, I'd do that at the head of an alleyway or an open door or something so I could do a runner first, but you get my point.

[robintohood]

Right.

[There's only so much he can judge, considering his adoptive dad's approach in vigilantism]

Especially if you're gonna do it at night. Might as well start up your own urban legend like gators in New York sewers.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Yeah, yeah! See? Foolproof!

[ She does a victory fistpump, which the squirrel on her shoulder mimics perfectly. ]

It's all about the misdirection!

[robintohood]

How long have you've been doing this?

[He's assuming not long but he doesn't keep track of everything in Central City]

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

A month and some change? Started testing it out in March.

... That said, now that I've shared this info with you in confidence, you're morally obligated not to narc on me.

[ She will crush your guns!! ]

[robintohood]

[There's that eyeroll again]

Yeah, yeah. Scout's honor and all that.

[Not that he ever was a boy scout]

I'm sure you can blend in with all the other squirrel-themed heroes.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

[ She is very used to that eye-rolling by now! ]

Pinkie swear on it?

[ Nah, she's teasing. She sticks her tongue out at him. ]

Man, not even kidding, more animal-themed heroes would be great. I'm not sure how many there are around here, these days. I haven't seen the bat-guy around in months.

[robintohood]

Maybe the weirdo left. Why? You were friends with him?

[He knows Bruce left but isn't going to reveal his personal connection with him]

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

He might've, yeah. We chatted once, I gave him some donuts, he gave me some coffee, that's about it. But there was rodent-adjacent-themed superhero solidarity there, y'know?

Didn't... you guys know each other? Sorta?

[ Sorry bud, there was that whole memory share incident a few months back, where she saw him as Robin! ]

[robintohood]

[Ugh. Damnit. He was hoping she wouldn't bring that up]

That was another life. It doesn't matter anymore.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

O-kayyyy, noted!

[ Note to self: Batman is a touchy subject! ]

Soooo, how've you been lately? What's up?

[robintohood]

[Dryly]

Oh you know me. Being a good boy scout like always. Rescuing cats stuck up in trees and all that.

What about you? Besides making your own cryptid urban legend?

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Oh, uh... the usual? Doing my thing, trying to get people to make good life choices like community college, staying under the radar even more. It's been tough.

[ There's also been some weird memory loss stuff going on, but ha HA that is not gonna come up in conversation here! ]

I'm gonna assume for the sake of this peaceful conversation that none of those boyscout activities involved pistol-whipping or gunfire.

[robintohood]

Smart decision. Saves the both of us a lot of trouble. You should do it more often.

[eatsnutsandkicksbutts]

Y'know, that sounds like the kind of thing that someone who has been pistol-whipping people and just wants to keep his weaponry intact would say. You should try being less brutal, save yourself the trouble.

[ She shrugs as she speaks, and the movement shifts her jacket enough to reveal a hell of a bruise on her upper arm. ]