metalogs | closed | door handles are off but you know i'll never miss 'em

Entry tags:

closed | door handles are off but you know i'll never miss 'em

Who: Alec Hardison (

phobulus) & Donatello Hamato (

purplexing)
What: Local teen menaces twenty-something who's used to being the baby of the group
When: Nebulously before Central City's lockdown
Where: A back alley near YOU (if you haunt Central City, that is)
Content Warnings: --

( it becomes clear, very quickly, that hardison is far outpaced when it comes to all of his most prized skills and talents. but, dear reader, it should not be said that he who proclaims himself protege to the ~~late~~ great nate ford is not also crafty in his own way! where technology outstrips, antiquitiy may indeed fill the gap.

that's why he's struggling with the lock on this hoopty. that's why. it's not that he already failed to break into a better car. no. that would be ridiculous. this is adaptation. this is the future: old crappy technology and mechanisms that can't be hacked by 1's and 0's, yes. this is the answer.

the slim jim comes up and the lock stays put, and hardison hisses out a curse word before letting his head bonk against the pane of the window. )

Never thought I'd say this but I'm actually glad you're not here to see this, Parker...

( another try, then, with all his focus on the task at hand—because there should be no competition for a junker like this, right? )

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[It has been a task in itself looking for a vehicle that fit certain specifications. It's taken time and patience, and to find some rando trying to break into your target?!

UNacceptable.

Look, he's sixteen and only has so much patience, so of course taking personal offense that someone else is edging in on something as good as his property is completely within reason.

Which is why Donnie drops in- literally, landing neatly on top of the car as his battle shell rotors fold in.]

Back off pal, I've got dibs here.

( he had planned a cover, just your usual slightly-dim-and-drunk guy mistaking one hoopty for his own and aww dang his keys just don't work, except—well. that doesn't matter when an alien lands directly on the roof of said hoopty.

so instead of smoothly extricating himself from the situation, hardison yelps, flails, and falls backward directly upon his rear. his reflexes catch up with him, and he lobs the slim jim at the green boy who's trying to kill him. (he will very likely miss...) )

[There's a response Donnie's more or less familiar with and yet almost caught off guard by. He's gotten used to people not freaking out upon first sight of him around here but he still only needs to lean slightly to avoid getting smacked by the would-be car thief's tool of choice.

Donnie looks at him flatly.]

Did you seriously throw that at me?

Yes!

( he is not comforted by this flat response in fact his brain is simply breaking... )

'Cause you—you're— ( g u l p ) —trying to abduct me!

....

Okay, so you are totally wrong.

[Donnie hops down from the roof of the car, still quirking a brow at the guy who's clearly overreacting before he turns to look at the car door. ]

( just shaking his head dramatically. the drama here is at a ten as he roots around for something else to wield in his own defense and comes up with a bag of gummies. just regular ol candy. crap. time to try the old plan: )

I was just trying to get into my car, ok? ( he pulls keys out of the other pocket now, jangling them dramatically. maybe this green person doesn't know what a slim jim is, maybe the plan will still work. this is fine. everything's fine. ) Gotta get home to the kids, little Parker and sweet baby Nathaniel. And—and my dog, Nate!

Your car?

[Donnie pauses at that, shooting a brief look back at the man before he considers the car again.]

You're sure taking your sweet time getting back to the fam, in that case. This thing's been parked here for days. And is the kid named after the dog or the dog named after the kid? Messed up either way, if you ask me.

[He hums, holding out a hand. Neon violet light starts tracing out above it, shaping something that probably looks way more menacing than the fancy lock pick he intends it to be.

...then again, it's Donnie.]

( afraid as he is, the embarrassment this teen has inflicted upon him lances deep into the very marrow of his twenty-something bones. he opens his mouth to sass back, but before he can, donnie's scary light show begins.

the gummies soar at donnie's hand, and hardison hisses in fear: )

I meant Eliot. ( this truly could not have gone worse for him. ) I got it wrong cause I'm drunk.

( no wait yes it can, because he gets up and follows the gummies, to rush donnie. )

[Maybe he's underestimated the crazy things someone scared stupid will actually do. Donnie has not taken into account the possibility of being attacked by a bag of gummies, and it's more the fact that getting smacked by the startles him out of his concentration than that his mystic-tech would actually fizzle out from such a weak impact.]

Ohmygosh even if you are drunk, that's a l-eh?!??

[Humans don't normally rush him. Of course, he usually avoids them or they're too fooled by clever disguises (aka: a hoodie).

It's not that far a distance for Hardison as he more or less slams into...well, Donnie's battle shell probably isn't the most comfortable thing to make contact with, but in turn he's sandwiching Donnie against the car they'd both been meaning to jack.]

-OW!

Oww!

( hardison echoes the sentiment, and pushes away from the car to make a run for it, except. that was a pretty solid thunk. and the alien says ow???

his reaches out with a fist to give the battle shell a solid knock. a little shave and a hair cut, even... )

The hell...?

-hey!

[Not taking very kindly to being tackled into a car, Donnie summons his bō to hand, a staff that glows briefly with that same purple light, except in this case it actually solidifies into something that looks like wood bound with wraps around its middle.

He snaps the end around with a twist of his wrist to try jabbing it back at Hardison, more to get the guy to give him back his personal space but if he does smack him, Donnie's not going to feel too guilty about it.]

( he tries to dodge, but a couple whacks get a couple yelps out of him—sending him darting backward with his arms and elbows covering his head.

but alien boy doesn't seem inclined to follow, nor to hurt hardison. through the gap in his arms, one big scared eye trains on donnie, roving from head to toe. )

What the hell even are you, man? Hitting someone with a stick...

Says the guy who threw not one but two things at me before slamming me into a car!

[Donnie huffs, turning to shoot the guy a dry look as he spins his staff and sets one end on the ground beside him.]

And to answer your first very rude question, I am obviously a turtle.

Edited 2023-06-02 19:47 (UTC)

( fear replaced by righteous indignation (how dare you make a solid point, whippersnapper), hardison's arms fall away from their protective form. )

Says the turtle who pounced outta nowhere onto the car I was boosting to freak me out and scare me off!

( did he say boost he meant unlock and get home to his family members of nebulous naming scheme.... )

[Dramatic pointing!!]

So you were trying to steal this car!!

( instinct makes hardison start to backpedal, and then he stops himself. )

So what if I am? You gonna hit me with a stick about it some more?

[Donnie rolls his eyes.]

Waste of my time. Besides, this was my mark first. So, if you'll excuse me, sir, I have a car to get into.

( donnie used psychic youth attack! it's SUPER effective! )

You— ( give him a moment, grandpa's recovering... ) Well you got to it too late! Once I get the parts I need, you're welcome to what's left, and maybe next time you'll get to it earlier.

( give him another moment to process how old he just sounded... )

[Is he smirking? Just a bit.]

Ohoho no, I am not settling for leftovers. This baby's coming with me.

[He makes a shooing gesture before turning to address the car door once again. Whatcha gonna do about it gramps?!]

Boy, if you don't bac—

( hang on. that's the second time that car swept by out on the main road. hardison frowns, and his tone changes. he reaches for donnie's arm not to grab on but just to get his attention. )

Yo, kid. Can you get outta sight and stay there?

( about that time, the car starts trundling down from the other inlet to the alley, and hardison can't tell if it's an unmarked cruiser or some gang patrol defending their territory. and he can't get out of dodge, but maybe the kid can. )

Like, now?

[The turtle tenses under that touch, ready for round two, but the whole shift in demeanor doesn't go over his head. Frowning, Donnie follows Hardison's look before nodding and tumbling off to the side-

Well, he done seems to vanish is what happens. Like a ninja do.]

( it goes relatively quickly. instead of his drunken dad routine, hardison actually flags the car down. motions at them to roll their window down and then loudly chastises the gang members for coming down the one-way alley the wrong way.

then he starts advising them about the aliens coming to abduct him and how he's going to be saved—and that they can be, too!

he takes a shove hard, falling on his ass enough that it does sting. but it also sells his harmlessness and the car rolls off again. he remains on the ground and once they're out of sight, he complains: )

You already in a gang, don't gotta be cruel on top of it, damn.

You should stick to the crazy act instead of whatever the other one was.

[Oh look, the turtle's resurfaced. He's also holding a hand out towards Hardison despite the unimpressed look. Try not to be too weirded out by him just having a thumb and two fingers, yeah?]

Yeah, yeah, all right. Know-it-all...

( less hostile, more...gruffly familiar, hardison scowls as he hops up to his feet.

even if he tried to be discreet, his face shows everything. and yet, despite goggling at the unusual number of green digits, hardison reaches forward to give donnie's hand a solid one-two tap, palms first and then knuckles, and then gives him a solid shake. where skin touches skin, hardison feels suddenly warm and his skin buzzes slightly, the way a 9-volt battery feels when you lick it. )

[Oh, old people still do weird handshakes too? Okay then. It's basic enough to follow, even if Donnie still thinks it a weird shift from earlier. So long as this guy's not freaking out at him anymore-

Although there's a weird sensation, and Donnie's not sure what to make of it as he arches a brow at Hardison.]

Whaaat was that?

( hardison rolls his eyes. )

Just a handshake, dude.

( he might be a freaky little turtle guy but he's got street orphan vibes, and as dramatic as hardison is, well, outcasts stick together. )

Look, I'll make you a deal. Whatever you need the ride for, I'm not taking anything that won't make it run. Just the radio, and if there's any boards that aren't integral to keeping the thing running.

[Don't be jelly of his amazing looks!]

Riight.

[Donnie looks at his hand as if wondering if it's malfunctioned somehow, but he shrugs it off, turning his head to look at the car.]

Well I guess I can part with the radio- I'll probably install something with Bluetooth anyway. What do you even need car parts for?

Edited 2023-06-03 17:34 (UTC)

Oh, you know. Hobby stuff. ( he lied blatantly through his liar teeth. ) What do you need a whole ass car for?

( satisfied with their deal, hardison gets back to it and by back to it i mean continuing to fail at breaking in )

[Fair answer. Donnie'd probably say the same if his needs weren't so mundane in this particular case.]

Transportation, obviously. I do not have the funds to be purchasing cars and then there's...well, this whole situation. [He gestures at himself.

Then he watches Hardison do a miserable job once again before shaking his head.]

Sigh. Have you even done this before? Here, stand aside.

[Donnie holds a hand up again to conjure up some unnecessarily fancy mystic-tech gadgetry, the purple rectangular markings on his skin glowing- a bit brighter than usual, he'd say, if he were paying attention there.

He nearly jumps as the neon violet light that forms everything else flares, and it seems harder to contain it into a given shape.]

AAH! Wha- Wait, what's happening?!

( eloquoently, hardison contributes: )

Uhhh...??? ( shake it off ) Is that not normal freaky deaky alien turtle stuff? Talk to me, what's supposed to be happening?

Not an alien!

[In spite of things he feels he must point this out.]

And no this is not supposed to be happening! -ohmygosh why is this happening- calm down, just breathe, Donnie, uh...

[He squints as he manages to disperse it.]

You saw me use it earlier didn't you? My mystic-tech- except usually it's not all over the place.

OK! Weird esoteric turtle-magic! How am I supposed to know? I don't know you, man!

( he's flustered, and yes, dramatic, and now also a little bit guilty and worried. his hands make soft fists at his side, and he chews at his lip. he's gonna have to invest in gloves or something, isn't he? )

Look, it's possible it coulda been not entirely all you, exactly. This mystic-tech, like hard light type projections, or something?

Making assumptions hasn't been working in your favor, just saying.

[Donnie turns his attention sharply towards Hardison then.]

Or something... [He allows the vagueness, brow lifting.]

Let us go back to the possibility that it is not entirely me...

( quietly, almost chagrined, hardison holds his hand back out. possibly his lop-sided grimace does little to instill confidence??? )

...Gasp, it was you?!

[POINT.]

What did you do to me!

Edited 2023-06-04 15:24 (UTC)

Hey, don't even—don't start that with me, kid. This is—maybe you're a turtle with technomancy or whatever but I'm just some guy, OK?

( BIG SIGH )

I don't even know what I did to me!

( does that make sense psych he doesn't care actually )

[That does dampen Donnie's accusation a bit. The turtle teen looks mildly bothered by that. He sighs, letting his hand drop.]

It's the stupid Confluence again, huh? I hear it gives out free powers sometimes like it's Christmas.

( my guy has been living in full denial, so his thousand yard stare down at his open but relaxed hands is uh pretty intense. )

Yup. So I guess no more handshakes.

( but also he's not trying to dump all of this on the kid. another solid deep sigh, and he's got to get himself together. shake it off, hardison! )

C'mon. We still got a hoopty to break into, know-it-all. You good?

Edited 2023-06-04 16:41 (UTC)

[Donnie looks down at his own hands.]

I guess that's a lot worse than having to worry about touching anything with a complex computer system.

[He blinks then.]

What? No, we're not just breezing over that, I want to know what you did exactly!

[With that, he fixes a determined look to the side as he tries to form something else, flipping his goggles down.

That light flares again, lines tracing in the air as he tries something simple, his bō. It still looks like it's trying to stretch beyond the defining shape. ]

( hardison throws his hands up in either surrender or exasperation. is this what his crew back home had to deal with all the time? no wonder they just shoved hardison off buildings without asking... )

Ain't nobody breezing. I mean, sure, we can stand here and I can tell you I don't know all night until that crew or the cops roll back around. Or— ( the driest look he can muster ) —you can take a second and figure out if you're good, we get this taken care of, and maybe figure out what the hell that electrical storm did to me.

Fascinating...

[Donnie at least hasn't completely tuned Hardison out, so he does pause his study to look back at him, making a slight face.]

...well, since you're being that insistent, let's see if this thing can still move. My mystic-tech at least doesn't appear so unstable that it'll explode or anything.

[He lets his staff vanish, peering back into the car window to this time form something else inside the car: a tiny hovering drone. Which he gets to unlock the door from the inside.

Donnie pulls the door open, eyeing things before he ducks down to have a look beneath the steering wheel.]

Given how long this thing's been left alone, there's no telling whether it still runs, is out of gas, or might be accessory to a crime, but I guess we probably should move to a better location if possible.

( hardison isn't a hide-your-emotions kind of guy: watching donnie's mystic-tech at work leaves him gawping openly at what seems to be hard light projections entirely under his control interacting with physical space. he has all the questions, but he also has the desire to get back to sophie in one piece, so: )

Right, yeah. Let's, uh, let's see what it's got.

( much less impressively, hardison hefts his plain old toolkit in hand, ready to crack some plastic and yank some wires. )

[Donnie looks pretty smug, always happy to know he's impressed someone.

He grumbles a little as he tries to get the ignition started.]

Hopefully all this thing needs is a jump.

[The turtle slips back out once he's popped the hood, propping it open for inspection. ]

Hey Nathaniel Sr, mind trying to start her up again while I jump this thing?

Senio—?

( awe broken, hardison scowls and grumbles. despite his disgruntled but quiet protests he folds his body into the driver's seat and is greeted with no view at all, starting at the open hood while he pulls the wires from where donnie cracked into the console. )

Nathaniel Senior— ( tap-tap ) —damn kids and their damn magic trying to call me a—can't even focus on the task at hand— ( tap-tap ) —gotta use fancy pants magic...

( another spark, and the engine whinnies more like an exhausted mule than a car that's about to run. but it sounds like the engine has turned over, so he pauses and leans his head out the window. )

We good?

[Still bitter about being assaulted earlier? Perish the thought!

Donnie gives a whoop from the other side of the hood as the engine still proves functional. He holds a thumbs-up out to the side, just visible.

The telltale purple glow winks out before he drops the hood and pauses a moment since Hardison's in the driver's seat. Eyeballing him, Donnie steps around to the passenger's side, rapping a knuckle against the door for him to unlock it.]

( no shut up you're bitter you ~~fetus~~ egg!!! also, regardless of his frustration he's not a monster, so once the door's open and donnie's getting in, hardison smiles at him, and puts a fist out for a bump. )

Nice work, kid. Where to?

[Donnie slides in, pulling the door closed as he settles back against the seat. He glances over at Hardison and grins, bumping the guy's fist with his own.]

The name's Donnie. How 'bout we grab some pizza and find a new temp spot to park this baby so we can do some better part assessment and removal?

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closed | door handles are off but you know i'll never miss 'em

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