Closed

[deadthenred]

Who: Bucky (deadthenred) and Kyle (torchbearer)
What: Awkward meetings as
When: The date it happened
Where: A coffeeshop somewhere in New Jersey.
Content Warnings: N/A

[ It's a nice coffeeshop, the kind with white walls, high ceilings, and exposed ductwork, the kind of places you find in Brooklyn, these days, with the kind of prices to match. (When did a cup of coffee start costing $7?)

He's not sure where Jason ran off to and why he left him alone with this guy. (Why is Bucky friends with Jason?)

Before going up to the counter and ordering, there's an awkward silence. This isn't like the other people Bucky's met through Jason, he has no idea what Kyle's deal is. ]

Are you— uh, another one of his brothers?

[ Dark hair, light eyes— they all have a look. ]

Comments

[deadthenred]

It was. [ To be fair, he only saw the first half of it.

Bucky stands up.]

Look, I'm gonna get another coffee. You want anything?

[torchbearer]

I wouldn't mind another latte, thanks.

[deadthenred]

You got it. [ He's not just getting coffee because he needs a little breathing room if he's gonna fill in— well, more about his past. But that's part of it.

Damn, he really should stop talking about Nazis. ]

[torchbearer]

[ kyle watches him curiosly. he's much more . . . mundane or quiet for a jason friend. or maybe jason has changed. which is wild to consider but not impossible.

at least, kyle always believes it's possible. for all of them. ]

[deadthenred]

[ Bucky spends his time in line thinking about what to say. Back home, everyone knew his story, or they could if they typed his name into a search bar. He'd gone to court, and gone to therapy, and didn't think he deserved a blank slate.

But he knew he couldn't heap his troubles onto strangers, neither. Doc Sampson had called it a "boundary."

He returns with the coffee, puts it down but doesn't drink. ]

I was born in 1925. When I first put on a mask, it was 'cause the Army told me to. Back in those days, they called heroes without powers tourists. And I didn't want to be a tourist.

[ He wanted to be taken more seriously than that, probably because he was sixteen. ]

[torchbearer]

[ hm. ]

So it's like you're chasing it. Superheroism, or being a good guy.

[deadthenred]

Maybe. [ He wasn't dousing himself with experimental formulas or anything crazy, but he was jealous, and it was easy could feel small. ] Happened more than once that some mad scientist type kidnapped my entire team, but left me behind. 'Cause I had nothing to offer.

[torchbearer]

And you believe that?

[ just curious. ]

[deadthenred]

No. [ Had it bugged him, yeah. ] I wasn't special, but I was good at what I did.

[ And he always figured out a way to save the team himself. ]

[torchbearer]

Special, huh.

I guess I never really got my head around that. Being special. In art, it's about the work.

[deadthenred]

Don't mistake me. Just 'cause what I did didn't require me to fly or catch fire, doesn't mean it wasn't necessary. Everyone was doin' their part back then. And so was I.

[ He takes a sip of his coffee, finally. ] If I was drastically underpaid, well, that wasn't special either.

[ Not that he did it for the money, but it was fun to complain about. Bucky figures an artist would probably understand that. ]

[torchbearer]

Capitalism at its best.

[ still he wonders at the trend of it. or maybe he's just never noticed it before. the justice league never deliberates over being special, it's just. the job. ]

So you wanted to help, to have impact. Right?

[deadthenred]

Just wanted to do my part.

[ It wasn't really top of mind to him. What got him was simple envy, the way someone throwing tanks around had a way of making your efforts feel small. He never felt that way anymore. ]

[torchbearer]

And you don't think your part is done by now?

[deadthenred]

I've been told the war's over. I died before V-E day.

[ He says that matter of factly. Obviously there's more to the story. ]

[torchbearer]

[ bucky, he's from the 90s. ]

Okay. Is it over?

[deadthenred]

[ Fake decade. Skipped all of it. ]

Yeah. [ A pause. He takes another sip of his coffee, which hasn't gotten cold yet. ] About seventy years later, Cap brought me back.

[ Don't poke at the timeline too much, it's comics. ]

[torchbearer]

[ wow!! ]

Right, but is it over for you?

Because it sounds like in your head, you don't think it is.

[deadthenred]

[ Bucky's natural reaction to questions about the state of his head is to deny having feelings at all. ]

Like that guy, Onoda? [ Or any of the other Japanese holdouts, hiding in jungles or ditches for decades, afraid to come out and make the surrender real. He'd heard about them. ] I couldn't get it confused if I tried.

[ If he's still dealing with Baron Zemo, that's Baron Zemo's fault. ]

[torchbearer]

Not quite the same.

[ but he's starting to grasp the few similarities between jason and bucky now. the never ending mission, the war. it's all the same. perhaps kyle is the same with the job, but he has goals outside of that. ]

You're not confused, but maybe you're waiting for an ending. Something that clicks for you.

[deadthenred]

Isn't everyone?

[ Not an ending, maybe. But a moment where everything falls into place, and the world makes sense. Not gonna happen, Bucky thinks. ]

[torchbearer]

I dunno. I never really felt that way.

[deadthenred]

Yeah? So what're you looking for, then?

[ Another sip of his coffee. ]

[torchbearer]

I dunno. It's not a calling or anything. I'm not even sure I want to do this forever.

[deadthenred]

Well, I don't think we're gonna be here forever.

[ Alternate dimensions don't last. ] But the Guilds sure don't want to leave us alone.