metalogs | Open | You think you're safe without a care...

((from here, in case you need to refresh the deal with the cats))

1. Diadem Hotel

[After Childe's heroic rescue, a trusty NPC takes Jaskier to the hotel and answers the hundred questions he has. It's a lot to take in, to say the least, but after the initial shock, Jaskier definitely gets excited about a whole new world and the incoming adventures. First, though, he needs to shower.

That... that is indoor plumbing. With hot water. And gosh, the scent of this not-oil-for-the-hair! Oh, he already doesn't want to leave.

Happy to have his lute and hat back somehow (magic, it's always magic), Jaskier takes them with him to have breakfast at the buffet. At least most of the food looks familiar, and what he can't recognize he still can take some sort of guess, so he puts a little bit of everything on the biggest plate he can find, takes two cups to fill with different kinds of tea, and finds himself a table where he can figure out the phone thingy while he eats.

His only technological knowledge is the little tips the NPC has given him, so at some point, he'll end up touching something by accident. Like right now, when suddenly Never gonna give you up begins playing at full volume - yep, accidentally rickrolling the entire room, a pity he doesn't understand the implications. Jaskier yelps and fumbles with his phone until he turns it off, then notices many people are frowning at him - perhaps even you, random stranger!]

My apologies, [He says with his most charming smile.] Funny little contraptions, aren't they?

[A few minutes later, he'll be making (kinda dirty) sounds while eating a chocolate croissant. He doesn't know what this brown stuff is but he absolutely loves it.]

2. Shopping Mall

[They told him these little plastic(??) rectangles equal coin. Jaskier isn't sure he understands how, but he isn't about to look at a gift Roach on the mouth. The bard will be wandering around, aah-ing and oooh-ing at everything, asking as many questions as he can before people get tired of him. Care to catch him? That said, most of his attention will be focused on two shops:

A. Clothing: he touches every fabric and celebrates the fact men have many more options here than at home. After taking a good look around, though, he still has one question.]

So many styles, how delightful! Pray tell, how I do know what counts as fashionable? [He thinks he's talking to the clerk behind him, but maybe it's actually your character! Suddenly, he pulls a face as he stares at a pair of crocs.] What the fuck are those? Please tell me I am not expected to wear them.

[B. Music: of course he finds the music shop! And the best part is, this is one of those places that has a piano outside for guests to have a little fun. Curious as hell, Jaskier presses each key to figure out the notes as he lowly sings a little tune.]

♫ Oh fishmonger, oh fishmonger, come quell your daughter's hunger~ ♫

[The innuendo he adds to that sentence implies is not actual hunger he's talking about. But before he realizes what's going on, his hands are moving and playing the melody on the piano as if this wasn't a completely new instrument for him. When Jaskier finally notices, he freezes with wide eyes, then yelps and steps back until he bumps into your character. Usually he'd apologize, but right now he's a little busy freaking out.]

I played that! How did I play that?! I don't know how to play that!

[Renown poet expressing himself perfectly, huh. See, part of Jaskier's new bardic powers include knowing how to play any instrument you give him. He just doesn't know that yet...]

3. Here kitty kitty

[You don't spend over twenty years traveling with a monster hunter without learning to climb a tree to stay away from said monsters. However, traveling with the mutated monster hunter that cats avoid means Jaskier isn't used to dealing with kitties. He climbs the tree and reaches the right branch, but he doesn't think of being sneaky in his approach, so of course the cat sees him, causing the chaos magic to kick in.

Now there's something a little bigger than a cat to worry about.

The mysterious beast on the ground begins hitting the tree as Jaskier screams and climbs to higher branches - yes, he's supposed to have magic now, but he's still figuring that out. And years of having run as his first instinct are hard to override.]

Fffffffffuck- Kikimora alert, kikimora alert! A little help over here, for fuck's sake!

[One second he's getting drunk in one of the many freezing rooms at Kaer Morhen, the next one he's blinking underwater, and somehow his hat and lute are back. As always, Jaskier has only the most important priorities in mind, so he hugs the lute close to his chest as if not believing it's really there.

He would stay like that if it wasn't for the little problem with, you know... breathing.

There's a bubble already coming from him, but Jaskier still thinks he's in his world and this is a sorcerer attacking the witcher keep again, so he panics. This results in him doing lots of flailing, because no matter how much he loves the coast, he isn't used to swimming this deep in the ocean. There's also the whole "I may've drunk a little too much" problem, oops.

When a bright red head swims nearby, he decides it can't be a sorcerer because they haven't come from his balls, so Jaskier shakes his arms and asks for help. "Asking" meaning "opening his mouth to yell and swallowing a bunch of seawater instead". So excuse him while he uses his last air to cough his lungs out...]

[The day after his network post, Jaskier shows up at Excelsior to pick up Harry after work as promised. He's wearing a colorful outfit perfect for the summer sun (especially the sunglasses! what an amazing invention!) and he's carrying his guitar in its case on his back. Before coming over, though, he texts Harry to ask about the Starbuck place, since apparently "coffee runs" are customary.

Of course, "coffee" is relative, because Jaskier chooses a frappuccino with too many extra sweet things to actually taste the coffee. When Harry comes out of the building he works at, Jaskier meets him with a nod.]

Master Osborn, [He teases, seeing Harry is dressed for business, as he hands his new friend the order he specified.] I showed the drink mixer your message, so this should be fitting.

[His smooth way of saying "if something is wrong you can't blame it on me, I barely understand it".]

[Jaskier has been going with the flow.

It's not like he hates it here - how could he? This is an entire new realm with so many things to discover! So many stories to pick up! And oh, his magic! He never thought he would love having magic so much. Music knowledge flooding his brain and giving him access to things he couldn't have dreamed of. Plus the people... There's bigotry here as well, no doubt, but Jaskier has found a new kind of freedom to relate to others that he'll never complain about.

But then the nights come, and when he isn't sharing the bed with anyone, then he's sharing it with alcohol. It's the nightmares, yes, but now with the added weight of trying to figure out what he's doing, what this means for his life at home. He tries to tell himself there isn't exactly a choice, it's not like any of them can go back at will, but what will happen if the time ever comes? Where do his loyalties lie? He's never allowed himself to be tied to one place, even if Oxenfurt had been his home, but he had started to be part of something... or so he thinks. He isn't sure The Sandpiper was still an option after the mess in jail, and Geralt had Cirilla and Yennefer, getting into dangerous roads for... whatever it is they're about to do.

Where does that leave him? Why can't he have his loved ones and this realm in one nifty package?

Well, it seems today he'll have at least one answer to that.

He's returning to the hotel after another round of shopping, dressed in blue and purple with brand new jewelry on his fingers but the ring and tunning fork still resting on his chest. There are sunglasses on his face, too, and he takes them off after dropping his bags on the floor when he sees her, as if he had to be sure that is truly her coming out of a random room.

Destiny has a wicked sense of humor, Jaskier knows, but this takes the cake. Once again, he wonders what this means for him and what it means for home, and why it's them that come together in weird times instead of the wolf that had always been so keen on protecting them.

But those are too many thoughts to deal with now, and Jaskier is more of an emotional person. So without touching on what this says about their relationship, Jaskier runs to Yennefer and hugs her - tightly, as tightly as he can, whispering witch with a broken voice.]

[Saying Jaskier has been squeezing the hell out of this credit card thingy is the understatement of the fucking century. He supposes the higher-ups do expect you to rebuild a wardrobe from scratch, but he has to wonder what they think of all the jewelry and the dinners at fancy restaurants (and, you know, certain acquisitions at the adult store).

Besides clothes and food, Jaskier's main attention has been (as usual) on music. His new magic has allowed him to play any instrument under the sun, and who is he to go against the wishes of his very own powers? The piano will have to wait for when he finally moves out of the hotel, but meanwhile, he's been buying one of everything else. Yes, even a freaking kazoo.

The one thing he's been avoiding, though, it's the instruments that work with electricity. He's definitely curious, but still kinda nervous about them. No risk no gain, though, so here he's at the music store yet again, dressed in a red vest, brand new rings on his hands but his ring and tuning fork still resting on his chest like it did back home. This bard doesn't know the meaning of keeping his buttons up, especially in this heat.

He's found a box of beautiful flower picks that he fidgets with after putting his sunglasses on top of his head to stare at the display of electric guitars, not knowing where to begin. That's when he notices a young man with quite impressive hair doing the same - and considering Jaskier is always ready to socialize...]

Ah, excuse me? [He says with a raised hand and his most charming smile in place.] By any chance, do you happen to have experience with these beauties?

[Look, just because he never played one doesn't mean he won't treat them like the pretty instruments they are.]

[The sky appears to be shattered, and Jaskier hates how looking at those splinters makes him feel. The mix of homesickness, awe, and fear is already bad enough when his own mind hits him with it during lonely nights, he doesn't need magic making it worse.

He's seen the guilds' All Hands On Deck call, and Jaskier does intend to help, no need for them to ask. He had already been planning to come to Sunset Falls because he's seriously considering it to be his next home, even if he considers the whole choice ironic - living here would be like being at Kaer Morhen, surrounded by the supernatural beings he's supposed to comfort, yet people in this town are fine. It's in Central that he needs to fight the bigotry the most.

Well, respect doesn't make history. After everything that has been going on in his life, he thinks he deserves a bit of selfishness to survive.

The magic here isn't acting well - he isn't an expert to read energies or whatever it is that sorcerers do, but he can feel something making his skin tingle. When he walks by the park, he notices a group of kids playing, and his fears are confirmed: the children are pretending to be knights and princesses, and the kid playing the part of the monster... welp....

He actually becomes one.

The other children scream as they try to run away, but it's not hard for the beast to get on his fours and trap them under his body. Jaskier panics, going through the list of spells he's been learning - there are many useful ones yet he's afraid to use them because they may push the beast into hurting the kids. Or even hurt the beast himself, which he'd rather avoid in case there's a chance to bring the kid back. There's only one safe choice, isn't it?]

Fuck. [He takes a deep breath, opens his arms, and begins to sing one of the many wonderful songs he's learned here.] ♫ How's it feel to be at the center of magic / To linger in tones and words? / I opened the floodgates / And found no water, no current, no river, no rush / How's it feel to stand at the height of your powers / To captivate every heart? / Projecting your visions to strangers who feel it / Who listen, who linger on every word / Oh, it's a rush / Oh, it's a rush ♫

[The casting of Enthralling Whispers goes well and now the beast's attention is on Jaskier. He starts running towards him at a speed Jaskier hadn't taken into account, so there's no time for him to change into this shield spell. The beast hits Jaskier with his horns and sends him flying, leaving a trail of blood on the grass as he lands a few feet away...]

[Jaskier is the kind of man that keeps his word... well, most of the time anyway. As long as it isn't very inconvenient! That said, when it comes to acquiring pretty things, he's definitely your man.

Dressed in a casual summer outfit, he shows up at Balthier's shop right after lunch. He doesn't directly go up to his friend, though, he wanders around the store oooh and aaahing at everything, poking as well. You'd think twenty years of traveling with a witcher and seeing cursed objects would've taught him better, but this is Balthier's place so he's sure it's fine.

Probably.]

My good captain! [He suddenly exclaims, still without turning to look at Balthier. Too many shiny things!] I hope you saved those folios for me as promised!

[Jaskier, Yennefer, Cirilla... this bard thinks the next one to arrive should have white hair and a strong horse smell, but as usual Destiny has other plans. Jaskier stares at the text Cirilla sent him and Yennefer, not believing what he's seeing. He knew this was an option, of course, but for it to actually happen to them...

Who is going to be next? Jaskier thinks of an old lady buried in Lettenhove and a young bard buried in Oxenfurt, and something gets stuck in his throat.

They meet at Cirilla's door in the hotel, and soon as Jaskier sees Yennefer, he wonders what she's thinking about this whole deal - she is, after all, Cirilla's new mom. Technically. He intends to ask her how she's feeling but before he can even open his mouth, the princesses arrive.

Fuck. Jaskier has always noticed how much Cirilla looks like Pavetta, but seeing them side to side is something else. Their age is so close, too, because Pavetta is as young as Jaskier had seen her over fourteen years ago.

...double fuck, they could be their daughters. Melitele, have mercy.]

Your Highness. [He says with a bow, deciding to stick to what Pavetta is familiar with until they get settled in.] It's a pleasure to see you again. [He means it, but he realizes how stupid it sounds to dance around the subject.] Would expressing my sympathies be too much?

[Showing condolences to families is something he can do, but how do you do that to the dead person herself???]

[He had promised Dylan they could start their classes once Jaskier settled in, and welp, that actually happened. The house matches the mood of the rest of Sunset Falls: old, fancy, and spooky. It is also bigger on the inside.

Look, you don't live with a witch without getting a few benefits, alright?

Jaskier gives Dylan a tour of the house, leaving the best for last: the music room. With a "tadaa~!" and open arms, he opens the door to reveal one of every fucking instrument, piano included. There's also a coffee table and comfortable reading chairs, plus the obligatory couch.]

Well then, young man, is guitar still your choice? Because there's plenty of room- [He winks - hah, get it?] -for you to find your one true love.

Open | TDM prompts as canon intro

Closed | Childe's heroic aquatic rescue

for Harry | CW: 420

for Yen | welcoming the wife

for Eddie | how many instruments can we get out of these credit cards

4th wall | there's only one damsel in distress here and ain't Yen

Shop visit for Balthier | pre-event

Discussing the situation with the chaos gals

Introduction of blond teens with monsterfucker parents