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[deadthenred]

Who: Bucky (deadthenred) and Kyle (torchbearer)
What: Awkward meetings as
When: The date it happened
Where: A coffeeshop somewhere in New Jersey.
Content Warnings: N/A

[ It's a nice coffeeshop, the kind with white walls, high ceilings, and exposed ductwork, the kind of places you find in Brooklyn, these days, with the kind of prices to match. (When did a cup of coffee start costing $7?)

He's not sure where Jason ran off to and why he left him alone with this guy. (Why is Bucky friends with Jason?)

Before going up to the counter and ordering, there's an awkward silence. This isn't like the other people Bucky's met through Jason, he has no idea what Kyle's deal is. ]

Are you— uh, another one of his brothers?

[ Dark hair, light eyes— they all have a look. ]

Comments

[deadthenred]

"Believed?"

[ He's questioning the past tense, here. ]

[torchbearer]

Well, they weren't around when I got it. They were wiped out.

They only came back recently. Force of habit.

[deadthenred]

Occupational hazard, I guess.

[ He thinks of how Steve came back to life to see him carrying the shield. And the bitter mix of hope and disappointment that Bucky felt, figuring Steve would be taking it back. ]

They let you keep it?

[torchbearer]

[ kyle twists the ring idly on his finger. ]

They owe me.

[ kyle would probably give it back if asked. probably. but the sacrifices he made for oa, for the guardians . . . he is their torchbearer. they may not ask the same of him as they do the others, but he'll keep the flame alive. ]

[deadthenred]

I bet they do.

[ Power like that puts a target on you. ] Would you give it back if you could? [ He realizes that's a big question, after he asks it, so Bucky hedges a bit. ]

I never had powers, but I know a lot of people who do. And some of 'em loved it, but some of them just wanted to be normal again, even if they couldn't say so.

[ Some of them were never normal in the first place. Maybe nobody is. ]

[torchbearer]

[ kyle considers this for a moment, his fingers cradling his cup. he ran from earth for a long time after everything. there was too much baggage and not enough . . . of a life. but giving up the ring? he can still picture major force's leering face. ]

I think it's a moot point. Wanting, loving. It's about how it's changed you. And how I've been changed by it. There's no magic that can turn back the clock.

[deadthenred]

Yeah. [ There's a bit of a sigh in his voice, and a lesson he didn't want to learn. ]

That's how you get the Nazis winning. [ Or Lukin and his quest to bring back the real USSR, whatever that meant. You can never go home again. ]

[torchbearer]

The . . . Nazis?

[deadthenred]

I used to be Captain America. You fight a lot of Nazis. Or psychos tryin' to bring them back.

[torchbearer]

I've fought a few, but nothing like that.

So . . . what does being Captain America entail? Besides punching Nazis.

[deadthenred]

That's a big question. [ The kind Steve would have an answer to, but Bucky never did. ]

Started as a propaganda gimmick, but the guy who had the shield first made it mean somethin' more than that.

[torchbearer]

That is kind of impressive.

[ because you honestly can't get more propagandy than Captain America. ]

[deadthenred]

[ You cannot. ]

No kidding. I guess in desperate times, people wanna believe in something. But that's only part of it. The other part… he was just good.

[torchbearer]

[ kyle blinks, looking at him. ]

What does that mean?

[deadthenred]

You ever met someone who can look at you, all kindness, and make you feel like you oughta be trying harder?

[ Or does he only know Jason. ]

[torchbearer]

[ he's had a rough life as a superhero, ok. ]

Trying harder, huh. To do what?

[deadthenred]

To be a better person. More generous, more patient. Less of a smartass, which is what I am, naturally.

[ He shrugs. ]

When someone sees the good in you, you wanna prove 'em right.

[torchbearer]

[ prove them right. what an odd way to look at it. or maybe kyle's just odd about it. no one saw anything in him to begin with and he knows that. and he certainly never weighs his actions on good or bad. seems like moral relativism at work. ]

Okay. But what's so bad about being you?

[deadthenred]

[ He pushes his lips together for a moment and raises an eyebrow. ]

Well, I enlisted when I was fifteen.

[torchbearer]

Putting aside that the army is a predatory organisation that hires kids too young . . . not sure that's the black mark you think it is.

[deadthenred]

Depends who's reading my file. I did a lot of KP duty. [ He shakes his head. ]

I didn't really mean it like that, though.

[torchbearer]

It's fine. I get it. Baggage, past sins, things you wish you've done differently.

But I just don't see a bad guy. Maybe that's why your friend mattered so much to you.

[deadthenred]

There're definitely things I wish I'd done differently. [ Bucky drains the last of his coffee. He doesn't think Kyle actually "gets it" but he also doesn't really want to correct him. ]

But I'm still trying. [ Trying not to be a bad guy. ] Cap meant a lot of things to a lotta people. That's why I knew it had to keep going.

[torchbearer]

[ kyle absorbs that. ]

Is that why you took his mantle? Just guessing.

[deadthenred]

That, and I realized I wasn't gonna let anyone else do it.

[ He would now, of course. But he was in a different headspace then. ]